Diary of a Palestinian Henna Party

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Posted by Kenzi on August 28, 2000 at 18:36:23:

Being a white woman in this mutli-kulti metropolis of NYC I meet a lot of women from different cultures with henna or who appreciate my henna, but rarely do I get calls to do bridal henna. It seems to me that most of them have someone from their culture to do it for them in the style and price they are accustomed to. A Pakistani friend of mine is getting married and her fiance suggested that I do her henna but she said "oh, my mother already has someone lined up to do it". Imagine my surprise when a woman with a strong NY accent calls to ask me about doing henna...I was just thrilled that she wanted hands and feet done (since so many people just want arm bands or bracelets). We talked prices for a while but it seemed that we weren't connecting, that we weren't understanding each other complete. Finally she said, "I want you to do my bridal henna and my henna party". I was even more thrilled.

We met for a consultation to talk about designs, dates, prices etc. The bride is Palestinian but raised her whole life in NYC, and the fiance is Palestinian but raised in Palestine. The bride explained to me that they don't have much of a tradition of complicated henna designs in Palestine and she wanted to change that tradition. The usual Palestinian henna is just dabbed on in really simple designs. She ended up hiring me for her henna party on one night (to do one of her hands, her fiance's hands and some friend's henna) and then another night to do the rest of her henna and some more of her friends.

Thursday night was the henna party, held at a hall in Brooklyn. I felt certain I was at the wrong place because it was a huge party, with banquet tables, a band, members of both sexes, dancing, food, a stage with throne-like chairs for the bride and groom...it was so different from what I expected for a henna party. In my experience in Morocco and also from my reading of other cultures' traditions, the henna party is a smaller, more-initimate affair held in someone's home, with just women, sometimes a singer with the invitees joining in on certain songs, singing, dancing, clapping and playing drums.

The crowd at this party were a sight to behold. The women mostly wore traditional dress: long gowns with an almost medieval feel to them (long drapey sleeves, high-waists, wimples), lots of color and embroidery, veils covering the hair, sequins, gold jewelry etc. Some women (esp. the older ones) wore the traditional dresses that are black with red and blue embroidery. The older women also had their hands stained orange with henna - I found out later that they mix up great batches of it to give as gifts to the henna party invitees.

I sat and watched all of this for about an hour, then the lights were lowered and from the back of the room came a procession of women with bowls balanced on their heads. These bowls contained the bags of henna paste and candles. These women formed a circle around the bride and groom in the middle of the dance floor and began dancing around them. They gradually speeded up the dancing in time with the music until they were whirling around the bride and groom all while keeping the bowls balanced on their heads.

When the dance ended the bride was escorted up to the stage and I was brought up there to start hennaing her hands. All the women were invited to circle round to watch the process. Having never experienced henna like this they stayed to watch the whole process. Once I finished one hand I was escorted off the stage to henna the groom's hands. I looked up to where I was being led and realized that I was to henna him while sitting on a chair on top of a table in the middle of the dance floor. I didn't have room on the table to bring my whole kit so I just stuffed some necessities in my pocket and climbed up there. I am a rather shy person and hate to be the center of attention in a large crowd but strangely enough I didn't feel that unease at the prospect of hennaing in these conditions. It must have been one of those right brain/left brain henna trances, but I was totally focused on my work, even when the crowd started dancing around me jiggling the floor and thus the table and thus my hand, even when the singer got up on a chair next to me to sing to the groom and incorporate my name into the lyrics, even when they started sifting soap lather over the head of the groom and into my fresh henna!

As I sat there with the grooms hand in mine I realized that I had never hennaed the hand of an Arab groom and had no idea what kind of design to do. Aaack! I have been in an Indian mood lately, taking inspiration from the Navneet books and had just done an Indian design on the bride's hand...I knew I couldn't get so floral and frilly with this big burly mustachioed Arab man, so I fell back on my all time favorite inspiration, Morocco, and went with it. I did his bride's name in arabic on one hand with geometric Moroccan designs around it and up the fingers. Then on the other hand some protective Berber symbols from Moroccan rugs. He was thrilled with the results and spent the rest of the evening dancing around with his hennaed hands in the air, showing them off and protecting them from smudging.

I then did some small designs on other guests and at 2:00 am called it a night and headed home.

Saturday was the actual bridal henna. The appointment was for 2:00 pm but kept getting pushed back later as various things cropped up on this day before the wedding. We finally got started around 7 pm. I did the other hand and then the feet and up the side of the leg, to just under the knee. The bride stood on a chair so I could do her legs without smuding the rest of the henna that was drying; she stayed on the chair for another half hour while everything dried. Meanwhile I hennaed some cousins and nieces and aunties, and then when back to the bride to do a design on her back.

The mother of the bride plyed us with delicious Palestinian food (a rice and yoghurt dish with goat and pine nuts), arab coffee with cardomon (yum!) and middle eastern sweets (homemade). We talked a lot about Palestine, weddings, arranged marriages, wedding customs, henna customs etc. I learned a little tidbit: they mix their henna with tea and yeast! Who knew? I finally left at 1:30 am when everyone was wrapped in cotton and tape and falling asleep on their feet.

The bride told me that everyone was so delighted to see the henna designs and kept asking for my card. I think that we have created a new trend, at least one localized in the Palestinian-American community of New York City. I am still a little tired from two full days of henna, but very happy for a great experience (plus photos, which will be posted on my website and here as soon as I can get them up).



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