I seemed have left my ability to spell on the pillow in that post...LOL!!! n/t


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Posted by Maureen on August 29, 2002 at 11:54:25:

In reply to: Texture...context...community values posted by Maureen on August 29, 2002 at 11:44:37:

: Hi Jessica,
:
: I didn't find your statement controversial. I found it resonnating
: with something I knew I know but could not connect with the thing I
: knew I know when I first read your statement. It was trying to
: dredge up a memory and understanding that was not immediately
making
: itself available. It was making me crazy trying to force it to
come
: to me. I read the statement repeatedly last night but could not
get
: to access on a conscious level what I was relating to about the
: statement. When I awoke this morning it was there.
:
: My father and all of his siblings made wine every year for as far
: back as I can remember. Fall was began when the wine was ready and
: my mother began to bake home made bread and rolls. Within my
family
: system, everybody knew who made the best wine...who made acceptible
: wine...and who was continuing to try to make good wine. My
father's
: wine was known to be the best. He held great status within the
: family because of this singular achievement above all else...except
: perhaps his thriftyness. This was acknowledged by his siblings
: request for a gallon of his wine each year. And he was oblidges to
: supply it. That was the responsibility that came with being the
: best. The individual recipes for wines were a carefully guarded
: secret. My siblings and I were never to tell my aunts and uncles
or
: cousins how the wine was made...not the process or the ingredients
: was to be shared. And it would get to the point that my father and
: his siblings would resort to lies to throw each other off if
someone
: came too close to discovering the truth. No family gathering was
: held that a gallon of hosts wine was not brought out and shared.
: When I was grown and moved away from home, my father supplied me
each
: year with at least three gallons of his wine while no one else ever
: got more than one gallon. I had established myself very early in
my
: life as both his wine-making assistant and the first person to get
a
: taste of his wine. When I was little it wasn't but a spoonful, but
: there was much pomp and circumstance around that moment. And if I
: didn't think that it was delicious, the he either reworked it or
: pretended that he did. When I became grown and got those three
: gallons of wine, I would bring some of it out to be enjoyed only by
: my closest and most intimate friends. For anyone else there was
the
: liquor store or a night club if they wanted something to drink.
:
: This wine would never have made a wine list at a restaurant no
matter
: how many stars it had or didn't have. It lacked clarity because of
: his insistence to add potatoes to the batch to make it stronger.
And
: no amount of straining and run off would make it clear. He
resisted
: putting it into anything other than a gallon jug. And if he gave
you
: a gallon of the wine, you had to return the empty gallon to him so
: that he could clean and sterilize and use again the next
: year...remember he was thrifty!!!
:
: In the context of my family, the making of the wine was more
: important than the quality of the wine. The wine making was
: something shared and understood and important to each member of our
: community...that constituted our family. Clarity was not
important,
: deliciousness was valued but not necessary. Even my uncles wine
that
: seemed more like syrup met family standards. The criteria and
: expectation was that wine be made and shared. The closer you were
: connected to the family system the more you understood this. The
: farther removed you were from the family system, the less you
: understood this.
:
: This is what your statement below brought up for me. And provided
: clarity for me concerning the thick lines and somewhat sloppy
designs
: that may appear on the hands of the women...or at least a clarity
: about how values may be placed upon how and why things are done
: differently depending upon whether or not one is part of or apart
: from what is considered to be the "community" itself which
: establishes the values and criteria based upon its own community
: needs. The value of just having henna on the skin and just making
: the wine feel the same...for me.
:
: Well, maybe your statement may be viewed as controversial. But I
: also "felt" it to be insightful. What may be important then would
be
: for us to remember that the wine is good wine or the wine is bad
wine
: depending upon whether ones perspective is from within or without
: what constitutes the community. I have never tasted a wine as good
: as my father's wine. There has never been one made. And what
holds
: those two statements true until today, is context.
:
: Thanks for prompting my stroll down memory lane..:-)
:
: Maureen
:
: Now for my controversial statement... I think this lumpier
: : henna is purchased becuase its A. available. B. inexpensive. and
C.
: : the henna I've seen done by people in person is of very poor
: quality.
: : Rudimentary designs, thick, and chunky. (everyone on this forum
and
: : those others whose websites we've seen blow the typical Indian
: woman
: : henna out of the water)
: : This is the truth as I see it.
: : The folks buying henna off shelves are using it for traditional
: : purposes, weddings, etc. where out in CA at least the focus does
: not
: : seem to be so much on the quality or 'beauty' of the design but
in
: : just actually having henna on the skin.

 


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